Household division, facilitated

Because some conversations need a steady hand.

All Settled helps separating couples divide their household possessions fairly, calmly, and clearly — with a structured process and support at every stage, without the need for legal intervention.

Try stage three — categorise 0 of 3 sorted
Sofa jointly bought, 2019
— unsorted —
Guitar owned before the relationship
— unsorted —
Bookshelf neither of you wants it
— unsorted —
Every item gets categorised before anyone discusses who keeps what — it's the single step that removes the most conflict.
The problem

Dividing a life together is never just logistics.

When a relationship ends, working out who keeps what is one of the most practical — and most emotionally charged — tasks a couple faces. Every item can carry history, and without a clear process, deciding what happens to it quickly turns into a source of conflict.

All Settled gives that conversation structure. Instead of negotiating item by item under pressure, both people work from the same inventory, the same categories, and the same agreed methods for resolving what's left — reaching a written outcome they can each feel good about.

All Settled isn't about taking sides. It's about creating the conditions for two people to have a practical, respectful conversation — and reach an outcome that works for both of them.

How it works

A five-stage process, start to finish.

01

Set the ground rules

Both parties agree how decisions will be made, and confirm that nothing is moved or disposed of until the process is complete.

02

Build a joint inventory

Working room by room, every item in the shared home is listed. Both parties review and sign off the inventory before any decisions are made.

03

Categorise each item

Every item is sorted into Clear Ownership, Needs Discussion, or Sell or Donate — before allocation begins. This one step removes a huge amount of friction.

04

Negotiate and agree

Contested items are worked through together with a facilitator, using fair methods such as prioritisation, alternating choice, or value offsetting.

05

Record and sign off

All agreed allocations are recorded in a written Allocation Summary, signed by both parties. Each person keeps a copy.

What's included

Every engagement includes the same four things.

01

Facilitated inventory

A room-by-room record of every household item, built together and signed off by both parties.

02

Categorisation & negotiation

A structured process for sorting items and working through the ones that need discussion.

03

Written Allocation Summary

A clear, signed record of what's been agreed — for both people to keep.

04

Ongoing coach support

Guidance from an experienced separation coach throughout, not just on the day.

Who it's for

Built for the people in the room, and the professionals around them.

Individuals & couples

People navigating separation

Whether you're currently separating or recently apart, All Settled gives you a fair, supported way to work through who keeps what — without it turning into a battle.

Referrers

Solicitors, mediators & therapists

A structured, trusted service to refer clients to — one that keeps the practical side of separation calm, so your own work can stay focused.

Employers

HR & workplace wellbeing

Offered alongside VHP Coaching's workplace wellbeing programme, as practical support for employees going through separation.

VHP

A service of VHP Coaching

All Settled sits within VHP Coaching, a practice specialising in supporting individuals and couples through separation and relationship breakdown — with experience across both individual clients and workplace wellbeing programmes.

Visit vhpcoaching.com
FAQ

Common questions

Do both parties have to agree to use All Settled?+
Yes. All Settled works because both people take part — it's a joint process from the first inventory session through to sign-off, not something done to one party by the other.
Is the Allocation Summary legally binding?+
The Allocation Summary is a clear, signed record of what's been agreed between you. It isn't a substitute for legal advice, and where a legally binding agreement is needed, we'll point you towards a solicitor who can formalise it.
How long does the process take?+
Every home is different, but most couples move through all five stages across a small number of sessions, spaced to allow time to think between decisions rather than rushing them.
What if we can't agree on an item?+
That's expected, and it's what Stage 4 is for. We use agreed, fair methods — like alternating choice or value offsetting — so contested items still reach a resolution both people can accept.
What if we can't be in the same room as each other, or prefer to do this separately?+
That's absolutely fine, and more common than you'd think. Each stage can be run with both parties in separate sessions — reviewing the same inventory, giving input on categorisation, and receiving proposals — with the facilitator relaying between you. You'll still reach the same joint Allocation Summary at the end; you just won't need to be in the same room to get there.

Ready to find common ground?

Get in touch to talk through how All Settled could work for you, or for a client or employee you support.